This post is dedicated to all my workaholic friends who work like there is no tomorrow.

The problem is that in 21^st century – many of us – are so much out of touch of our own being that we do not know what makes us happy. If you do not know what makes you happy – go find your purpose in life first. My purpose is sort of figured out but there is a bit of a workaholic in me so “Mr. Pawar the message goes to you also. Stop for a moment”.

Some of you who are familiar with my writing may ask – when you are suggesting us to stop then why write “Just do it.” You are right. I wrote that. But I did not say that – do it, without ever stopping. It makes sense to stop. It helps you think, relax and be efficient. Let’s explore.

Why stop?

Because life mimics more a marathon than a sprint. I got this perspective while sitting next to a top insurance executive on a flight earlier this month. He was reading “Don’t Sprint the Marathon” by V. Raghunathan. Every day we work to stay ahead in the proverbial rat race. What do you think about it? Do you want to run the race longer or just burn out trying to outdo others in the short run? Rome was not built in a day and if you want to build something remarkable it will take time. Be in it for the long haul and when you do that it makes sense to stop once in a while.

Because life is a gift that needs to be cherish, enjoyed and not wasted. All of us have one life to live. It is too precious to be wasted. It needs to be enjoyed while we are in a vertical position; because there will be no chance when we go horizontal. If we keep on running mindlessly where will be the time to live our dreams?

As a kid each one of us had some wild dreams. Not all wild dreams are unattainable. You got to believe in those childhood dreams; take time to remove the haze from the screen of life and see those dreams clearly again. At one point some of you wanted to become an actor, musician, singer, writer, scientist, entrepreneur, social activist, or a change maker. Stop and take time to live these dreams. At the very least plan it. If today you are busy handling subsistence issues, carve a parallel path for yourself. It is totally possible.

Enjoy small victories – everyday triumphs – smile on the face of your loved ones; inches lost form your overfed belly, your idea that got implemented or the complement you received for the way you looked. When you really want to – you will find many little bundles of joy in your life.

Because it helps you to relax and be productive: When you stop, you can relax, recuperate and work better towards your goals. It is very difficult to think creatively and give your best when tired.

When you stop you give your body and brain a chance to stop, relax and recuperate. When relaxed your brain can function better, it is easy for you to focus and create work that you will be proud of. Many 21^st century professionals get to eat lunch when it is time for evening tea. What is the point in working like that? It is good as an exception but not as a rule.

Because it helps you to reflect: When you reflect, you ask questions.  Then you try to find answers to these questions. It is very important to ask right questions. You can also look and decide whether you are headed in the right direction. You also get a sense of what is right and what can be improved. It is good to reflect by choice than when old age or something similar forces you to reflect.

When you stop you also give yourself a chance to review and build on what you have done before. This is important for healthy growth – and to draw a bridge between past and future. Reviews are a great way to be efficient because they give you a chance to measure and optimize.

How to stop?

Break out your shell and do what your heart tells you to. I endeavor to do that regularly. I got into film school couple of years back to learn how to direct films. Back in 2009 I got trained as a disc-jockey (DJ) with one of the best in business and I am happy that I did that. My writing pursuits also started long back due to a heartfelt desire to express and share.

So go out and learn what you always wanted to. If you are in a job utilize your holidays to do something close to your heart. If your calling is adventure then go out – meet the mountains or the sea and you will be a happier person.

Do not wait for weekend or holiday season to stop. Even if it is a Monday or a weekday and you feel like you do not want to do what you are doing. Then do not do it. Take a walk – long one – if the need be. No need to be too philosophical about it – take a break if you think it is the right thing to do.

Do it every day. Take time everyday – I would say – every couple of hours to stop, reflect and breathe. Think about past couple of hours – and how you have spent these. It is OK if you have spent time – having fun; doing some productive work or talking to friends or family. But it may not be OK – if you spent these hours thinking of doing something and not actually doing it.

This will also help you get out of overwork mode. If you have been working for past many hours glued to a computer screen or working with a tool-box; then it may be a good idea to stop.

Do you think it is a good idea? Then why not stop for a moment to breathe.

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If you think about it – only doing does not get desired results. Putting some thought into what you are doing is also important. Ok, doing is related to growth and success. But doing more will always not lead to achieving more. As Stephen Covey says, “take time to sharpen the saw”.

Our brain and body are tools that help us take action and realize our dreams. Importance of attention, focus and a clear brain has increased many folds in knowledge economy. So it is important to find time to relax, recuperate, and reflect (3Rs). For these 3Rs – you need time; now the question is – where to find time in a day packed with work, travel, meeting and social engagements. The solution is simple – unpack your day.

I am sharing initial steps for unpacking your day below.

Accept: That you need time to relax, recuperate and reflect.

Delegate: Divide your work for the day and delegate 50% of it. If you work in an office with people – which most of us do – delegation provides other benefits also. By delegating work;

• You show that you trust others working with you.
• You are able to scale up the output.
• You make sure that work will continue even when you are not present.

Collaborate: If you are working on a project that requires you to work on something that you do not know much about; find somebody who has the necessary skills. Partner with them. Partnership can be in different forms – client-vendor or a business partner for a particular project.

Curtail your to-do list: Growth oriented professionals people focus on productivity and love to work with to-do lists; as these lists provide them direction and a series of tasks to accomplish within a stipulated time. In our quest to unpack a day a long to-do list can come across as a big hindrance. If your to-do list is too long – strike items off the list that can wait till tomorrow. It should be easy to strike 40% items to do off your list.

Do less: If you can do 3 client meetings do 2, it helps you be more relaxed and focused during the meetings. Get in the habit of writing smaller emails. If you are writer and can write 1000 words in a day then write 500 for a day or two. You see I eat my own pill. The article you are reading is less than 500 words (497 words). If you work 5 days a week try working only 4 days a week. Read 24×7 to 4×4 to explore more.

You will be happier; more relaxed and be able to do more when you unpack you days regularly. It is worth giving a try. Go, unpack your day.

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If you ask yourself regularly – “is there a better way?”, you can create a unique space for yourself in whatever area you work in. It works irrespective of your role or area of work. Why it works? Because, not everyone does that; people are too busy running. They prefer running aimlessly – than to stop and think about improvement.

Let us see how people can use this question.

Entrepreneurs (can ask): Is there a better way to deliver a service or design a product? This may have been the question Steve Wozniak and Steve Jobs asked themselves – when they started working on what later became a Mac. Google may have asked this question when search-engines like AltaVista ruled and they were just a small entity trying to create better search in a university lab. Established players need to ask this question on a regular basis if they want to stay in the game.

Teachers (can ask): Is there a better way to teach – something that teaches them to question the status quo at an early age. They can share a story or a movie that teaches the value of virtues like truth, humility and compassion. They can use drama to teach the art of better expression.

They can ask themselves – can there be a better method of teaching than just asking students to read the chapters and the answer the question. What if the students start with questions first and find the answer in nature and through fun and interesting discussion.

Writers (can ask): Is there a better way to tell a story – in a way that it touches the heart of the reader, sparks an idea, or simply amuses and entertains.

Father or mother (can ask): Is there a way to a better parent? Ask yourself – what is the way to strike a balance between being overly possessive and being indifferent to the demands of your child? Is there a way that can help you know your child better? Can you create a better environment of growth for your child – by creating a balance – where TV, internet, outdoor activity, spending time with friends, reading, and healthy eating all are part of your child’s life? How to help your child grow by setting an example through your own life? How to help your kids unleash their full potential by not pushing your own desires and unfulfilled dreams on them?

Marketer (can ask): Can I be more truthful in communicating with the target audience. Can I drive my products, service or business by delivering quality, being innovative and inducing trust then by pushing products and spamming people with promotions at odd hours?

The question each one of us can ask?

Is there a way I can become a better human being? By speaking less and doing more; by trying to be more understanding, considerate of the need of other person, by active listening, by giving with an open heart, by being truthful, by helping people and reaching out to those in need; by complaining less. When you ask this question chances are that improvements will touch each and every part of your life. It will help you become a better father, husband, son, friend, marketer, entrepreneur and every role you play in your day to day life.

So if you want to be unique then ask yourself today – Is there a better way of doing it?

Thanks for asking this question. I am thanking you because I want you to be better at what you do.

To your success and growth.

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“Humility makes great men twice honorable.”

This thought emerged in my mind couple of days back while sitting with a group of people over lunch, one of whom was ex-chairman of a large public sector corporation.

I always make an effort to meet people from different walks of life unrelated to whether they are successful or not. I try to help wherever I can and also ask for help if needed; because if you can’t ask for help you cannot give it.

Many people who become successful in worldly sense – heads of corporations, people with more money or with a comfortable life more than many – tend to close themselves to outer world. This change – if you observe closely – does not happened in a single day but over a period of time. No offenses meant to people in this situation as they themselves do not know what they have become.

Such people are personified by following traits;

False Superiority: Such people live cocooned in their own world mostly with people who work – not with them but under them – and who praise them for no obvious reasons – may be whose pay-raise depends on these people with false superiority. This instills a false sense of superiority in these individuals. This is different from having high self-esteem. This is about thinking that you are more important than many in the world.

Living in the past: Such people live in the times that have gone past them and the world. No point resting on one’s laurels and talk about what one did 10 years back or last year.

What is more important is what you are doing now. If you did something great, remarkable and memorable then you will not have to talk about that. People will talk about it themselves. Something what Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Teresa, Steve Jobs or Bill Gates did? You see I love both Apple and Microsoft for different reasons and guess that is ok.

Living in a different world: These people think there are only few people worth talking to in this world – people who are at similar title, with similar wealth or social standing.

Negative body-language: Such people close themselves to others. They sit with cross-folded hands in meetings and in public interactions. They stand with higher than usual heads.

If you are one of the above then you may be missing on many good things of life.

What are you missing?

Love of people: People give their love and appreciation to people who smile at others and convey that they appreciate your presence. If you come across somebody who rather than smiling scoffs at you then chances are that you will not reciprocate with love unless you are a saint.

Joys of life called laughter: Laughing with an open heart brings great joy to people. Somebody who thinks that he is superior to others will not be able to relate and laugh his heart out. When you laugh with people you experience the joy of togetherness which is irreplaceable.

Growth and learning: Really growth-oriented people are always open to learning. I really like this story about the Zen Master and University Professor.

“A university professor went to visit a famous Zen master. While the master quietly served tea, the professor talked about Zen. The master poured the visitor’s cup to the brim, and then kept pouring. The professor watched the overflowing cup until he could no longer restrain himself. “It’s overfull! No more will go in!” the professor blurted. “You are like this cup,” the master replied, “How can I show you Zen unless you first empty your cup?”

Many of us have already heard and read this story at different places. If you come with prejudices and think that you know all there is to know then the chances for you to learn anything new are bleak. At times people think they can do without learning new things – that is to their own peril.

Friends and Happiness: If you live a cocooned life then you will get away from real friend; and those who know about the joy of friendship know that it is an eternal source of happiness.

New connections: When you interact with people from different walks of life, may be not as successful as you – then you open yourself to new connections. Connections open new doors, help you find new partners and collaborators. Truly success-oriented people always are on the lookout for new connections.

I am sure you are somebody who is interested in new connections, wants to grow and want people to love them and unravel in the joy of life. If you want to do all then be open to new ideas and people; and meet people with open heart how-ever successful you may be in worldly sense.

Hope it helped. Give me an opportunity to open my heart to you by sharing your thoughts in comments.

Joy, Peace, Love and Growth to all.

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Why can’t individuals do the same and improve? This case has been made earlier also. The idea now is to bring some structure to it. For some people a structured life is boring. But in places where you need to implement a plan it works wonders. Once you have established the basics you can let loose and go with the flow – coming back to check once in a while.

What I am suggesting is a daily, weekly, and monthly review. Annual review is also very important but calls for a separate article. Here we’ll just discuss daily, weekly and monthly reviews.

Many of us – get down to assessing our growth in mind once or twice a year – mostly at the times of major turning points in life – around job loss or marriage etc.

But if you commit yourself to doing regular daily, weekly and monthly reviews it will make a world of difference. You got to give it a try to experience the benefits. First do it for 30 days and later you can add month on month.

All right, now you have committed yourself to regular personal review. This is how you can actually do it.

First you need to set different parameters to base your growth on.

For daily review the parameters can be;

• Working on an important task every single day
• Helping those in need – knowledge, money
• Giving a gift to people you meet – smile is the best gift
• Avoid distraction (like endless emails and web surfing)
• Earning more than spending every day (monthly earnings can be averaged out to daily)
• Writing everyday

For daily review you can set aside 10 minutes every day. At the end of the day ask yourself did the day passed peacefully and as you wanted. Did you do something during the day from among your chosen parameters? Did you do all or some? What was ok, what was good, and what could have been done better? Finally before ending your work day just plan your first important activity for next day. It can be going for a morning walk with family. Write what is important for you.

Weekly review (30 minutes): Here you review you daily success with your chosen parameters and set the course right where any shortfall is experienced. On this day you can also update your chosen parameters.

Use the weekly review to take a broader look at your daily review. How many days you were able to do justice to the parameters. You can also note any new connections made; things like reconnecting with old friends; any new client connections that were made; weekly minimum numbers for exercise finished.

Monthly reviews (60 minutes): You review the impact of daily and weekly reviews on your monthly outcome as seen by yourself. The above listed daily parameters can correspond to monthly outcome in following way. This is just for your understanding.

So get set to get your daily dose of personal reviews. Hopefully this will turn out in a significant success in months and years to come.

Enjoy the journey on the path of life.

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Just reflecting on the years that have gone by.

2005 was the year of opportunity, making connections, gaining new ground, getting help and growing.

2006 was the year of coming back to roots.

2007 was the year of renewal and moving ahead.

2008 was for donning different hats.

2009 was the year of clarity, being on the centre stage, learning new skills, enterprise, and work-life balance.

Coming back to of 2010. The theme this year is to conserve, focus, returning to basics, living with less, loving more, reaching out and genuinely helping those around.

This will also be the year of discovery, revival, innovation, action and organization.

This is for a great 2010 for the entire planet and for you.